It's Okay With Me

by Molly Lambert

"My name is Donald Duck, fuck you. You know my name."

Oh my god! Everyone pitch in so This Recording can buy Elliott Gould as Philip Marlowe's apartment from Robert Altman's The Long Goodbye! Lost cat and pot brownie baking naked hippie chicks next door are presumably included with purchase.

These could be our neighbors! They do open air scarf dancing!

How do you think Charlie Kaufman felt about his NYU Film school chum Chris Columbus during all the years Kaufman was unknown and Columbus was juggling Spielberg's balls at Amblin? I hope some of it comes out in Synecdoche.

Jack Davis's poster artwork. Get ready for a MAD post soon.

Charlie Kaufman wrote for Get A Life, the great 90s sitcom where Chris Elliott played an adult paperboy who died in almost every episode. He also wrote for Ned And Stacy, where we assumed he died inside quietly.

Woody as The Little Tramp, photo by Irving Penn

"I liked Woody Allen when I was younger. The early Woody Allen is a complete mess, which I liked as a kid, but he was also a person that I could aspire to be, you know, short Jewish guys up there on the screen. I wanted to write comedies when I was younger, and yeah I liked his style. But I had a different idea of things then." - Charlie Kaufman

Woody as dirty old man, present day

Dear Woody Allen, I fault you entirely for Overinspiring at least three generations of short Jewish guys. Although nothing will ever fix this, you can start by giving this short Jewish girl the Key to the Friars' Club.

Reparations can be made out to mollylambert at gmail.com.

P.S. Please stop making terrible films. It's embarrassing.

P.P.S. You better pull an ace out of your old man hat for L.D.!

How about Woody Allen sequels? This is so McSweeney's of me. Remember McSweeney's? I know it still exists but remember...it?

WOODY ALLEN SEQUELS

Zeligs
Next September
Return Of The Jade Scorpion
Melinda and Melinda and Melinda (or, Melindaplicity)
Manhattan 2: Manhattan On The Move
Take Bananas and Sleep
Husbands and Wives and Korean Stepdaughters
More Crimes And Misdemeanors
Hannah and Her Doctors
Stardust Dementia
Play It Again Sam, Again
Sweeter and Lower Downier
Reconstructing Harry
Annie Hall and The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull

(with contributions from Tess)

Ryan Adams likes big dictionaries. He is our kind of man.

The notion of judging someone by their bookshelf comes up a lot in Annie Hall. I'm pretty sure that if you rule romantic interests out based on what they're reading you will almost definitely end up alone like Gustav Von Aschenbach in Death In Venice.

Calling Mr. Oswald with the swastika tattoo. Your son Max Mosely's Nazi-themed orgy sex tape is the craziest British sex scandal in a while. Way to make Spitzer look relatively less fucked? As horrible as this is, I feel like Mel Brooks, Larry David, and Sacha Baron-Cohen will have a good laugh about it.

Molly Lambert is the senior editor of This Recording.

SONGS FROM ANOTHER WOODY

Dusty Old Dust (So Long, It's Been Nice To Know Yuh) - Woody Guthrie: mp3

Bed On The Floor - Woody Guthrie: mp3

Little Black Train - Woody Guthrie: mp3

This Recording Is The Party That Makes You Feel Your Age

PREVIOUSLY ON THIS RECORDING

Andy praised Shadows.

Sex tapes should always have a soundtrack.

Fear of sluts guided our every move.